Bye bye my dear! :'(

Muahahaha!~I took off my braces TODAY! kekeke!~ Damn happy but also missed my braces which accompanied during my ups and downs of 2 years plus :P Hmm...still not get used to it without braces, felt 'emptiness' in my mouth. LOL.

~*Happy 21st ever*~

Merry X'mas

Ho!Ho!Ho!~Merry X'mas to everyone!

This is one of my favourite festive season ever!haha! Love the atmosphere, love the gifts, love the greetings... and everyone just seem so nice during this season!~

Well, this year is the so-called last year teenager life of mine...Most of my friends they already turned to adult, yeah, they are 21 now. And me, going to join them SOON!~*Arghh*Scary!

Anyway, hope everyone enjoy during this beautiful season with their beloved ones and hope Mr.Santa gives a surprise to you in this year!~Ho!Ho!Ho!Merry Christmas, guys ;)

Dedicated to Darling

Finally , met up with my darling, chip :) I was overnight at her house having some pillow talks... I have been waiting for this talk for ages, you know! Yeah, it was great that you finally came back, you're hotter and prettier than before, you're still that kind, passion, patient, loving, caring and all the good ones and I miss you so ;p All the things I wanted to tell you has been kept for so long...and until I've forgotten what else I want to tell you, haha! One thing I don't know it's good or bad is...whenever the sad things I wanted to share with you, became not so sad already after telling out to you, haha! Everytime also like this, why ah? Thanks for everything chip, being a good listener for me all these years :) Love you to the maximum, always *Wink* ((hugs & kisses)) I love you loads =>

I think I need to clarify something that I wrote previously in this blog. My bestie, has been accused me (made it sound very serious) , said that I want books, don't want friendship...! Nope, IS NOT! Just that I've been focused on friends too much, but neglect other things that all the while I want to do. You know, I've been emotional many times due to the friends stuff and I need to cut it down now. I've been hurt for uncountable times. I don't want to sad over friendship thing again. Don't want to get annoyed. Don't want to be frustrated. Don't want to so care every little thing that makes my heart feel uncomfortable. You might say I am cruel, but why don't you look things at this way-- if I keep continue like this, I will be emotional again and again, why don't you stand at my side to look at my point of view? Do you prefer the emo me? I just want to choose a new way to live well, live happily. I don't know I can make it or not, I'll try. All I want is to be happy always, ain't this is what you want me to do so? Is not that I won't put much feelings, in fact I did very much. I still care the ones I care, still love the ones I love. Maybe I show my love in a conservative way and you can't sense it? OR should I tell you what I've done for you? Sometimes, I felt like I want to do this so that my dearly friends will know how much I appreciate them. BUT then, will they keep in heart and touched? As long as God knows what I've done and as long as you have faith to me and to this friendship, time will reveal everything, trust me. I am looking for long-term friendship, not those hi and bye friends. And now we are going to graduate soon...Gosh, I really hope time will pass slow, I don't want to imagine the days after we separated, maybe I too rely and too dependent on friendship and you might don't know about this. And in fact, many things you don't know about my inner feelings. If you know me well, you will know that I am the kind who is stubborn at the appearance, soft at heart. What I've meant for the previous post is that I want to be a passive gal, take less initiative, throw away my emotional moments (am slowly trying to work on it) and want others to take initiative to concern me back, coz' sometimes I need that much too. A simple hug or simple concern will make my day turn to be better. You never know a sentence like 'How are you today' will simply make me feel that I am concerned by you. Say it only when you mean it k? No doubt, I am cool at outlook, but I am not cruel ok?

It's the time...

Things have never been smooth for me in this year. I had some conflicts that kept bothering in my mind, my heart. I met friends that told me to cool down and looked things the other way round. Whenever I am down, I can't stop myself to find him to talk about the stuff and cried it out loud. Yes, I am emotional when I faced the things that I care all the way I grow up -- friendship. I am really sick of myself that why I've been bothering it so much? People are not as care as me OKAY? Friendship is just some passengers walk through my life, I know that well. I just can't easily let go them,those that are important for me although we are apart away from each other. Well, I've overcome it now, mostly. I just angry for myself why everytime I can't handle the emotional things myself without go and tell to the others? If possible, I really don't want to disturb them, some listener might be helpful, some might just helpless. I want to learn to face it by MYSELF-- all alone and swallow all the things. Siew Yann has been telling me that I am still naive and pure and there's a lot of things for me to learn yet. BUT, I did grow! I DID! Maybe I still not that master in judging people escpecially those hyprocrites. Maybe I look things too seriously than the others. It's ironic when I put more efforts and my feelings to frienship, instead of my own career, future. It's the time now... to act for myself, my life. Too much things are waiting for me to do! I always tell this to myself, but seem like again my nature to put frienship as vital place. Human being always know their mistake without repent on it, and they make the same mistake again and again. INFINITY. Hope things can come to an end, and I want to get things done. Not much time left for me though... ...It's the time to ACT! No more talk, but ACTION !

I am regret for being so drunk yesterday. I have never been like this before, silly me, being so foolish to drink so much yesterday. And bring troublesome to friends as they need to take care of me. I puke, puke and puke. The feeling is not good. I promised myself I don't want this to happen on myself again. I will love myself more. I dont want to be headstrong anymore.